Dinosaurus

It's the 60's and the impossible is possible. If I were a joking man (and you all know I'm DEADLY SERIOUS!) I would say this was due to the LCD, but this is the early 60's and that wasn't a thing yet. The hippies hadn't taken over yet and the only counter culture buffoons of the time were the Beatniks, thankfully not featured in this film. This was a time when the wonders of science were still fresh in the public mind and the average Joe didn't know that a frozen solid Dinosaur(us) couldn't possibly thaw and begin wreaking havoc! It was because of this delightful ignorance that movies like the amazingly awesome DINOSAURUS were made.

The film takes place on a tropical island where a small fleet of men are blowing something up in the water. It's actually a pretty cool way to start the flick and lets you know immediately that you're not in for the standard stupid mildly sci-fi adventure film. Because of legal restrictions at the time men were not allowed to make blunders in movies so things get a little hairy and too close for comfort when a woman in a boat almost gets blowed up. Turns out she was bringing the men sammiches and something to drink. A woman who can't drive well and is bringing men sandwiches? When was this made 1960? oh wait...

And where, pray tell, is my sandwich?

So while blowing things up real good they unearth a couple of frozen prehistoric treats in the form of a Brontosaurus and a Theodore Rex. They haul the beasts from a couple dozen fathoms up and lay them out to thaw, they were in the fucking way! They also uncover a caveman who looks uncannily like a Buck Kartalian doppelganger. I don't know how long it takes to melt a ton of ice, but it takes a couple hours for these dinos to completely thaw. Just in time for little “insert Spanish name here” to run
away. Through his petulant action, however, we learn that the Caveman and the Brontosaurus are both nice, well nice enough. The caveman and bronto help fight the T- Rex, but he ultimately wins out and it takes a large piece of machinery to put him in his place.

Dinosaurus is a silly movie with ridiculous acting, a story that makes no sense, and giant dinosaurs running amok. This is also the exact reasons why it's so great! Is the acting good? NO! Is the story good? NO! Does it matter? NO! Dinosaurus creates it's own logic and the world is a better more magical place because of it. If you long for a time past where Dinosaurs could roam a small tropical island with man, go rent Jurassic Park, but if they're out, get DINOSAURUS!

3 Buck Kartalian Cavemen out of 5

you make this too easy Buck

Drink up, We've got movies to watch!
Moe