Dollman
Thirteen inches…with an attitude
Tim Thomerson plays Brick Bardo (a full moon pictures regular); in his world he’s a wise crackin cop on the edge. He packs the most powerful gun in the universe, specially made for him. Dirty Harry’s got nothing on this guy. At the beginning of the film he’s already on suspension from the force for a previous bloodbath he had caused and he stumbles upon a hostage situation in a Laundromat. He dispatches the baddies in a typically gruesome manner and is regarded as a hero.
The baddie in question ties a group of fat women around himself like a fleshy human sheild
Everything turns to shit though when he encounters an old enemy, now just a floating head (that’s all they could salvage after his last encounter with Bardo). Through an unfortunate series of events they wind up blowing a hole in space/time and they wind up on earth where he comes to find out that he’s only thirteen inches high and everyone thinks he’s a toy (dollman…get it). Thankfully his insanely powerful gun is still strong enough to kill full grown people, he discovers this after the local hoods start fucking with him and he takes it upon himself to create a faster way for them to get food to their stomachs (albeit drastically shortening their lifespan).
Post apocalyptic washroom
The leader of the Earth gang (played by Jackie Earle Haley) gets pissed and, having gotten the idea from the floating head, decides to retaliate. Bardo dispatches his men with ease and the leader is left badly hurt, the head patches him up and for his kindness is summarily squished. There’s a final standoff between Haley and the Dollman and I won’t ruin the surprise for you over how things turn out.
Shot taken from the upcoming documentary "Haley: Those years forgotten"...Kidding
Mix together an insane story, half finished special FX (granted this was a screener so it may have been a rough edit), a fresh faced Jackie Earle Haley and Tim Thomerson, who is just awesome as Brick, some friends and a bucket of popcorn and I think you’ll be happy with the results.
8 out of 10
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