Private School

Private School

“You’re breaking my heart, you tear it apart so fuck you”

In the realm of romps there are few better than Private School. Amazing cast meets hilarious story for an end result that will make you long for more when it’s over. Mathew Modine and Pheobe Cates play Jim Green and Chris Ramsey, a couple in love. Chris goes to Cherryvale academy and Jim goes to the nearby Freemount. It’s the classic all boy/all girl set up we’ve seen a million times, but it was a fresh idea when Private School hit the theaters. The boys at Freemount are always sneaking over to Cherryvale to spy on the girls and pranks are par for the course.

All the standard pranks are there. The boys sneak over to try to snap nekkid photos of the hot girl and wind up falling flat on their faces. The old burning bag of dog (horse in the case) shit prank. Drawing genitalia on the human anatomy poster. The snatching of the hot girls shirt while she’s riding her horse that prompts the line “that’s the finest example of bareback riding I’ve ever seen” and, of course, the classic graduation scene.


I know this certainly is the finest bareback riding I'VE ever seen

There are a couple of factors when considering an 80’s teen sex romp, but most important of these is humor. There is nothing worse then popping in a romp and after a promising opening credit song and set up you settle into 90 minutes of pure boredom (see: weekend pass). Thankfully you have me to tell you what are the worthwhile romps to watch. Private school (for girls) is up there when it comes to the HA HA’s. Aside from the classic pranks listed above there is a wide assortment of hilarious supporting characters and all sorts of crazy antics.

Music is also a huge factor. All the greats in the genre are bursting at the seams (and I don’t just mean the cheerleaders outfits) with insanely great music. Usually starting with an awesome opening theme song and typically involving several licensed songs or original pieces, but it’s very important these songs are great or it ruins the movie. Sometimes the music is used along with the movie to highlight some specific attribute of what’s going on. In private school there is a well Choreographed workout scene to American girl by Rick Springfield. I probably don’t need to tell you what attributes they’re trying to highlight (read: tits).


Really Rick? Didn't your mother tell you not to wear the neon pink tie with the neon blue shirt?


Actually the one thing private school (for girls) is missing is Eddie Deezen, but they can’t all be perfect, right? RIGHT? Private School is damn close though; Great cast, Great music, Great nudity (especially by the character Jordan, see: bareback riding pic above), Great pranks and Great antics! If you get the chance to watch Private school, TAKE IT, you won’t be disappointed. Oh and sorry guys, no Phoebe Cates nudity in this one, for that pick up “Fast Times at Ridgemont High”.


Sorry guys, not in this flick

9 out of 10